The Peanut Chronicles

My terrifying heart pounding experience that altered my world just little bit took place this morning. The day started out simple enough. The alarm went off at 615 and the bear and I took turns smacking the snooze alarm over and over. Yes, I do have a two-hour commute to metropolis to go to work. Yes, it is a nightmare on Mondays. But it didn’t matter. It was a little time for Bear and I to be happy and snuggly. Nut was quiet. That is all that mattered.

Eventually, at about 640, I heaved my ass out of bed and began to get ready for work. First in the agenda, as always, was to check on Nut. Bear had put him to sleep in the living room in his rocking chair at around 5am. We hadn’t heard a peep since then. I walked down the hall and my heart skipped a beat.

Even without my glasses I could clearly see that the rocker was swinging. I could see that the batteries were working fine. HOWEVER…. THE ROCKER WAS EMPTY. NO NUT IN SIGHT!!! My heart stopped as I noticed the bundle of blankets that was on the floor next to the rocker. It was Nut’s giraffe and airplane blackest that he loves sleeping in.

The world seems to slow down when you think that our baby has been hurt. I felt like I was watching my self run to the swing in slow motion even thought I knew I as running at break neck speed down the hall, screaming at Bear, “He fell out!! He fell out!!” In the five seconds it took me to get to the rocker and the place where his blankets were, nightmare scenarios flew through my head with the greatest of ease. The baby is not crying. The baby died. The fall broke his neck. My Nut is gone and so is my life.

Skidding to a halt on my knees in front of the blankets, I grabbed them up quickly to assess the damage. What I saw made my heart really stop and my stomach churn.

Nut was not in the blankets. HE WAS NOWHERE TO BE FOUND.

Immediately I start screaming, “He’s gone he’s gone!!! Bear Nut is gone!!” and thrashing around, as if throwing all the toys and blankets around the living room would help me find my two and a half month old son. All the statistics of missing children went screaming through my head. I was looking for the phone to call 911. After all, MY SON WAS MISSING!! The world must stop and pay heed to that detail!

Bear, at this point, has begun to run down the hall towards me. Panicked and white in the face he is screaming, what do you mean he is gone??!”

“He’s not here!! Someone took him!!”

it’s at this moment Fly Girl, nanny extraordinaire, comes screaming out of the office quickly with the Nut asleep in her arms.

"I am so sorry! I go there early and he was fussing so I picked him up and fed him. I had head phones on in the other room and I didn’t hear you!!”

Bear makes a quick U-turn back to the bedroom because he and I were both nude. I didn’t care. I ran over to Nut, naked as the day I was born, having no shame, and double-checked that he was really there and not some sort of dream. He was snoring softly in FG’s arms, a dazed look on his face and a slight smile.

I can’t imagine what would have happened if I had woken up ad someone had really gotten into my house and taken the one thing that was more precious to me then anything else in the world. Take the jewelry, take the lock box and safe, take the computers and anything else. Just as long as my son is safe, then I am ok with every thing else. Nut cannot be replaced.

Now I am at work and the adrenaline is wearing off. I can think clearly again. I am no longer blinded with panic. They don’t tell you this when you become a mother. They don’t give you a clue how to handle one of those scary moments.

1 Comments:

First Year said...: Wow.... that sounds scary. I can't even imagine the panic!!!Thank goodness for Fly girl :)

Glad to see your son is safe and you're mainly calm :); 7:51 AM

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