The Peanut Chronicles

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Oh no, I've said too much; I haven't said enough

We did it. Bear, Nut and I went to Easter mass yesterday at the local Catholic Church. It was rather pretty too. However, it was probably because I was laughing so damn hard that I got through it all.

Oh yes, it seems that Nut like church as much as his mom does. Mass was looooong and started out in a very Pagan-ish way. They shut off all the lights in the church. Outside there was a storm howling around us, trees shaking their angry fingers at us like we were damned to hell. Then, in the back of the church, the Father lights a flame to symbolize the rebirth of Jesus. It was very pretty and as I sat and swayed with Nut I couldn’t help but think of the bale fires that druids light at the turning of the seasons to symbolize rebirth. While the masses sat in revered silence, praying, Nut in my arms and almost asleep did the unthinkable:

“BBBEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHH”

Really, the burp would have made homer and barney proud.

People looked at me and smiled. Most of the people there are in their elder years (or “a see of gray hair” as Big momma C, head of the clan, said later when we visited her to show off the baby) and they smiled. I couldn’t help it. I began to crack up. All of a sudden I am 20 years old again at my mother’s funeral at the same church cracking up all over again. Nut opened his blue eyes and smiled at me before falling fast asleep.

Bear arrived a few minutes later and I whispered to him the events that had just taken place. He grinned and took Nut from me. Midway through the service, right during the pomp and circumstance of the second prayer, in the holy silence, Nut lets loose a fart that could move heaven and earth. We sit in the last pew, shaking with silent laughter. As if he knew he was making his parents crack up, Nut continued to let out a large array of farts for the next few minutes. Even people around us began to laugh a little. Eventually, Bear had to walk out with him. He was laughing g too hard.

All in all it was kind of a nice service. I looked at the amazing stained glass throughout the building. Each window had a different theme. There was St. John the Baptist, Moses receiving law, Abraham and Isaiah, etc. I have the most problem with the last one’s story. What kind of God would say, “Hey, kill your only kid to prove that you believe in me” and at the last minute say, “Just kidding!” I know, it’s about faith.

Most of the mass I spent staring at this little section of the church. It was an alter and it had candles on it as well as a statue in it of a lady. Above the little area was lettering that said, “Shower of Roses”. I texted Moe before mass started, curious what it was. She wrote back she wasn’t too sure. Some how I just feel really drawn to it. I don’t know why.