The Peanut Chronicles

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Recapping the the Key Noteness and other random information

So where the hell have I been? Oh you know… here… there… mostly there. This past weekend was, thankfully, much MUCH cooler and Nut was much happier. And yes, I went to the Key Note thing. And yes, I did make an ass out of myself. Well, sort of.

The KN was ok actually. I was remarkably calm which is odd because I look forward to speaking in public almost as much as I look forward to going to the dentist. But here I was calm and relaxed. Maybe because this was my baby I was talking about. Touchy subject but as Militant Yuppie puts it, “No really Jo, you WROTE the book.” I find that funny. True, but funny.

I am introduced as “This lovely young (really? Young?) Woman has been a speaker as several (uhh… three) conferences, recently completed her Master’s degree and has written a book that is being released on sexual assault and the use of therapy. She is an award winner (are they talking about the stipend? The bane of my existence? The thorn in my side?), has had several journal article published in the research field (two) and currently doing research on the sexual deviances of men (damn you love child! They called ya didn’t they?). Please Welcome Joanna Joseph.”

Sidebar: how the hell did they get all that info? did they sleep with someone for it? well, who ever gave it to them better have given good head. :P

The speaking thing was actually pretty good. I used my typical power point that I use that has the volunteer’s art in etc. I am talking with an audience when all of a sudden it happens. Sitting about ten rows back is Mike. Yes, that mike. I literally stopped in the middle of my speech. Then I coughed, got a sip of water, and continued. He’s there with the police force.

He’s a fucking cop.

I still can’t get over this fact.

The second thing that happened in my speech is a little less nerve racking. The zipper on my skort broke. That was funny. I just thanked whatever deity let there be a podium in front of me. Later I got some safety pins, which kept popping (damn baby fat!!)

Afterwards, I had a bunch of people come talk with me and ask where they can find copies of my book. Included in those people? Asshole. He said nothing. He just gave me his AA chip and walked away. 5 years sober. Impressed? Sort of.

After I left I went across the street and had a drink with some really cool and hilarious people and laughed a lot. Just what the doctor ordered.

Yesterday’s job would have been perfect, if it weren’t 18.86 an hour and part time. That’s 29,400 dollars before taxes. Good grief. Job interview tomorrow (the second!) and right now it looks like that will be the one I take. Sigh. Working with kids again.