The Peanut Chronicles

The Bear has dropped a bombshell. He no longer wants to fly jets. Hm. That’s interesting. The Bear ahs always been a jet man…and I mean ALWAYS. His parents rave about how he has known what he wants to do since he was a little boy. He went to school for it for fuck’s sake. And now… now he doesn’t want to be a pilot.

What does he want to do? He wants to move to Scarlet Wood. Buy a house; take in the beauty of small town living. He wants to get his MBA, which he never wanted before. I think that he doesn’t like me being more educated then him but that’s my personal opinion. Then… HE WANTS TO MOVE TO EUROPE.

I.AM.DUMBFOUNDED.

This is the discussion that we had the other night. Europe. And you know why?

“Because you have put your life on hold for me for so long that I think it’s time that I put my life on hold for you and we follow some of your dreams.”

Again, dumbfounded.

Yes, I have wanted to move to Europe for several years now. It’s part of the joy of being a duel citizen: I can work in the EU. What would the Bear do? Stay at home with the Nutter. Because “I realize now that there are more important things in life then money and success. Having Nut has made me realize that you and he are the best things to happen to me. If I don’t have you, well that’s a life not worth living.”

(All right, say it with me “awwwwwwwww”)

Personally, I think he is having a midlife crisis. He’s at the age for one. But who am I to tell? That, and now the Johnson’s aren’t sure if they are going to buy the company and so the company might just shut down. I think he’s panicking.

Oh yes, and the job interview today was interesting. Dude, the cops were there when I showed up! Why? The girls were being arrested. One of the counselors broke down and all hell broke loose. It’s benefited, 39 grand a year (in metropolis?!!) and it pays back the stipend. I am going to hate every minute of it but will more then likely take it if I have it offered just to get the fucking year done.

I am frustrated and depressed because I think that I am worth better then that I a while ago I decided to stop selling myself short. However, the catch-22 of the whole thing is “what if this is the best offer I get and I turn it down?” I don’t know what to do and that frustrates me to no end. And then I look at jobs in Europe. They start at 50K American. I am disgusted that America doesn’t see social workers and therapists for what they are worth. I am disgusted to live in this country.

Growl.

Oh, and Bear’s grandfather died this morning so he is trying to find meaning in that (“He got up, his wife went out for an hour and when she came home he was dead. What is the fucking point of that?”). Preaching to the choir on unjust deaths buddy. This is missingshosts.blogspot for a reason. I think he is freaking out because it is the second major death in his life. Me? Let’s count… Aunt, mom, Grandfather (x’s 2, but the mom side was more life changing for me. The one on my dad’s side was more life changing for Punk), Grandmothers, cousins, very good friends, teachers…. Yeah, welcome to my private hell.

It’s been a long day.

4 Comments:

Suburban Turmoil said...: That's awesome about Europe. Which country?; 10:17 AM
Nut's mom said...: probably the UK, Wales, Scotland or Ireland. I can work in any.; 1:25 PM
Mamacita Tina said...: Glad to see Bear is thinking about what's best for you. Wow, Europe...if you go, you have to keep blogging to let the rest of know how it goes.; 2:19 PM
Suzanne said...: Wow, I hope it works out for Europe. That will be great, and important for peanut to get to spend some time with his dad, too. (I love when parents take turns staying with the kids; I think everyone benefits. But that's just me.); 9:36 PM

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